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Today Has Been WEIRD!

A gay man from another country who’s been following my profile for a while now (and who gave me permission to write about this) approached me online stating that he heard gay marriage was legal in America and wanted to marry me in order to become a citizen of the united states of america. 

What struck me as funny was that he actually thought I was gay based on my posts. I don’t know what in my posts lead him to believe that, but It does totally go to show that gay people come in all shapes and sizes and types… and apparently there are some gay men who might be confused for straight chubby nerds from California. I’m sure there are. 

The other thing that was funny about it is that this is something out of a weird Adam Sandler movie or something. The gay foreigner approaches the straight American in order to gain citizenship? Hilarious! Or not. Whatever. I have a hard enough time with my life and relationships as it is. I don’t need the complication of convincing the government that I’m in love with a stranger.

But then what really struck me as sad was that this guy was wrong. Gay marriage isn’t out right legal in America and not the two places that I’ve lived. Despite being the home to millions of gay people, California has made it illegal and Oregon where I now live it’s illegal as well. There are partnerships but that wouldn’t get him the right to be a citizen.

What an Amazing Night!

There are some nights that you spend with friends that make you feel like everything is ok, like the cosmic tumblers has clicked into place and that the moment is just for you and your friends. Tonight was one of those nights. 

What started as wings and beer with my room mate Jacob turned into a bonfire with my other room mate Christopher and our good friend Murdoc (which isn’t his real name… at least not yet).

Jokes, talks about movies and music including really interesting tricks trombone players can do to play three notes at the same time, and some of the best hookah smoke we’ve ever shared.

I’m going to miss all this as my Portland living experience comes to a close in just a matter of days now. I’ll be visiting my sister in and family in San Antonio for my sister’s college graduation, helping her pack up and move and then I’m spending the majority of the month of may with my family. From there I’ll becoming back to Portland to start packing up, getting my life in order and moving back to my old home in the bay area.

My DJ career will have far more support there as I’ll have my own studio/office space, more DJing friends and venues I’m familiar with. It will also be easier to plan events and nights with them where we can make big things happen. Starting a promotions company with people I know and trust in the Bay Area DJ scene just seems like a smarter move. 

Truthfully I am really excited about the move, even though it means leaving a city I love and friends who I adore. But once I get things together a bit more, get some money together, I’ll be able to come and visit for holidays and the like. I’m also very excited to be living on my own again. Having room mates is nice for nights like tonight when things flow the way they should, but there are some times when things get tense, and it’s hard to walk on egg shells for that long.

After my health/cancer scare and sickness issues my doctors came to the conclusion that part of why I was so ill was the pressure of living with people. When that all comes to a close life will be much easier. 

There are other reasons I can’t wait to move. Certain relationships I want to rekindle, and friendships that I want to reinvest in fully. I miss my buddy Sean, my family and the ever lovely and amazing Grape Soda (yes that’s a person, she’s fantastic). 

Expect a lot more mixes on my DJ tumblr and more vlogs to start up again. Things should be back to normal in no time.

Trying to be a better man… that’s cheesy but it’s true…

I’m trying to be a better man, a better person and a better potential boyfriend. I’m seeing some one now and I’m trying to be some one that’s good for them. I’m removing distractions, changing how I act and none of it is in a negative way.

I’m legitimately trying to be a better person because they inspire me to be. I want to be what they deserve and that’s keeping me going. It’s a great motivation to continue on with the progress I’ve been making over the past few years and now for the first time in a long time I’m really happy…

Batman & Guns…

I’m not writing to capitalize on what’s happened in the past 24 hours. That’s not the kind of person I am. I’m more just trying to get my feelings out and discuss how I feel about Batman as a character, what these past three films mean and how impactful they are on the public or could be. 

There are a few legitimately strong lessons in Nolan’s Batman films and the strongest of which is “Why do we fall? So we can teach ourselves to stand back up.” This is a theme that resonates through the entire trilogy. With Bruce falling with the death of his parents and Batman standing in his place, then Batman falling so that the reputation of a good yet twisted man may stand up, and then Gordon falling for the same reasons as Batman, but morally feeling broken. This is a lesson not only of self reliance but of relying on other people to help you when you need them. 

The second biggest theme is Batman’s disgust for guns. They ruined his life when one took his parents, then the love of his life is disgusted at him for even thinking that a gun could solve his problems when he wants to murder Joe Chill, and then, while stretching the idea further, he refuses to even kill with a sword when ordered to by Ras Al Ghul. 

Even in the sequel, The Dark Knight, Batman has a chance to shoot The Joker or at least run him down on the Batpod and doesn’t do it, nearly killing himself in the process.

Batman and Bruce Wayne’s stance against using guns has been criticized by readers of the character over the decades and while Batman used guns when he started it’s been a sticking point that he not use them. From The Dark Knight Returns, Batman snaps a rifle in half and states, “THIS is the weapon of the ENEMY. We do not NEED it. We will not USE it.” and “A gun is a coward’s weapon. A liar’s weapon. We kill too often because we’ve made it easy… too easy… sparing ourselves the mess and the work.”

In the Dark Knight Rises there are multiple instances where characters have issues with guns including Batman who tells Selena Kyle (Catwoman) not to use a gun, Joseph Gordon Levitt’s character John Blake not liking the results of defending himself with deadly force and more. There’s a joke involving a character being killed with brutal fire power that undermines the message for the sake of a big laugh, but it fits the tone of the film.

So we have this message through Batman’s history. This idea that we can be above guns, that we don’t need them to solve our problems and yes there are grey areas with Batman using guns in his past but that’s not the current message of the character…

The most impacting moment for me involving this topic came over a decade ago and involved the first 5 minutes of Batman Beyond. Batman is an older man and when trying to stop a kidnapping/ransom he holds a gun to a criminal and that’s when he knew that he couldn’t be Batman anymore. He had to hang up his cowl and go into retirement. You can watch that clip HERE.

I’m not trying to make a point about gun laws or politicize what happened in Colorado with this post. I feel horrible for the people involved and hurt by what one man did. I do feel that the man should pay. The deaths of 14 people is a huge deal and I understand that a lot of people don’t feel safe this weekend. The movie theater is supposed to be one of the safest places in the world and when that safety is torn away and we’re left with the horrible actions of one person ruining the lives of dozens, it’s hard to comprehend. 

I feel like I needed to get this all out on the table because these are the ideas rattling around inside my head right now. I sat through 9 hours of Batman films and the two lessons that I pulled away are in direct contradiction with what one awful man did and I think that says something. I think those ideas of falling and getting back up, and guns are powerful and that they mean something. What? I don’t know. Maybe we’ll find out in the coming weeks. 

Big Day Ahead… early to bed… early to rise.

Tomorrow is a very big day for me. I have a very important performance to put on and it’ll be my first big return to DJing in years, probably since I moved into this house. I hope it goes well and that everyone is receptive. I’ve been practicing for pretty much 2 weeks straight. Here’s hoping! 

Tumblr and Facebook Crossing Over…

It’s very rare that I’ll meet some one through Tumblr and then have them cross over into my facebook life as well. As much as I vent and send out my frustrations here on Tumblr, talk about my personal life and worries here, Facebook is that true insight into everything including my family which I like to keep incredibly private as my family are private people.

That said, some one from Tumblr saw me on Facebook and added me on there and I’m happy to say they’re some one I think is worthy of that cross over. 

To boil this all down… If I add you on facebook or accept a request it’s because I think you’re an interesting and dynamic person and I wouldn’t mind you getting insight into my private life. As lame as social networking can be, I do take that kind of thing seriously and you should realize that there’s a level of trust there.

Oh or it means you’re a really hot chick that I want to make out with. 

Life is Hella Weird Sometimes…

I wrote that blog about vlogging (ew how hipster and awful does that sound) and then Timothy DeLa Ghetto likes it. Huge thanks to my boy Jacob Patterson for reblogging it, tagging on his own sentiments because without that Timothy wouldn’t have seen it. 

It’s odd how in one night you can write about something you’ve been feeling for literally MONTHS if not a year or more and suddenly it all comes together in words and one of the people who is in the circle of people you may or may not be talking about sees it and respects it. 

Those are the kinds of moments in life that I love. 

Was I Too Mean?

I’m very flattered when people praise the writing I’ve done in reviews, news articles or podcasts. I’ve had plenty of people tell me they love my live streaming channel on Twitch or even this blog… and I’m especially flattered when they ask me to work with them.

Last night I went out to see The Avengers and wrote a review about it where my last two or three paragraphs were about the D-Box motion code (which is the best to date). A kid emailed me and asked me if I wanted to come write for his site. I was flattered that some one would want my work showcased. 

 So I go to this kid’s site and I look and I’m just not into it. The idea of the site is to review theatrical D-Box movie experiences. The problem is this… D-Box movies only come out once a month. Maybe I should explain D-Box here?

D-Box is a seat that is installed in a movie theater (or at home for quite a lot of cash) that moves in time and with the motions of what’s being acted on the screen. You feel big explosions and shakes, gun fire and action. The seat sways with flying scenes and shifts from side to side during car chases. It really does put you in the movie in that you are literally feeling what everyone on the screen is. It’s rather impressive. Ok back to the story.

This kid Chris wants me to write for his site but he goes about it the wrong way saying that he’s not interested in making money and that he’s not a good writer and believe me it really shows. It’s great to want to have an idea and to try and execute it and when you have an idea but don’t have the talent to execute it you take that idea to people that do and direct them to push your vision into the world. I’ve done that in the past, I’m relying on a lot of people to help me with my documentary project and I understand that it’s part of business… but when you say “I’m not interested in making money” then you lose me. Why should I want to work if this is never going to pay off? Especially when it’s clear that I’ll be doing most of the work.

I laid all of this out on the line very clearly. I stated that I wouldn’t be interested because the site is incredibly rough and I don’t really want to put my name on a site that looks like that. I also stated that I don’t think D-Box is ever the most important part of a D-Box experience. Tackle the movie as a whole first and then talk about how D-Box enhances or detracts from the experience. The film is the heart. If it’s weak D-Box tech can only do so much to bring it to life. 

I continued on saying that it’s never good to tell people that you’re not interested in making money, especially when D-Box is such a high cost experience. In order to see a 3D and D-Box feature you’re spending 20 bucks easily on just one seat. That’s quite the investment in time and money. Right away every time I write something for this kid (who didn’t even include his last name or his history of working in journalism, criticism or anything) is expecting me to pay for my movie, drive 30 minutes to see the movie, and then review it for him… and not pay me, not give me money to pay for the ticket… nothing. I’m not hip to that.

But was I mean or was I refocusing this kid? I think I might have been by telling him that the site in general is a bad idea, and it is. Explaining to people why a D-Box movie is or isn’t a good investment is great but the problem is, D-Box movies only come out once a month, so trying to keep people on your site doesn’t do anything. Making a D-Box article a feature of a much larger site on the other hand is smart. It brings them in, they see it, and maybe they find something else that keeps them coming back.

Our podcast for instance is once a week but we want to move to twice a week so people have twice the reason to come to the site. Having one article a month that’s a review of a single movie? Nobody is going to care. They might find your site but they might forget the next day and never come back. You have to have a reason for people to want to be on your site all the time.

Maybe I was just stern… overly so? Maybe. I don’t know. But it’s bothered me all day. Maybe I should really wake up and get some food in me before I respond to emails.  

The First Famous Person I Ever Met

When I was a kid I went to a Star Trek convention. This was shortly after The Next Generation had ended but I was in a Star Trek tizzy. I wanted more and DS9 wasn’t doing it for me. The paper had said that the actress who played Deanna Troi was going to be there and being that I was a pubescent boy with the hots for the good counselor I really wanted to go and meet her. Turns out it wasn’t going to be the beautiful and lovely Marina Sirtis but rather Majel Barrett who had played Deanna Troi’s mother Lwaxana Troi.

This didn’t matter to me. At the time I didn’t know a lot about the original Star Trek series so I didn’t know that she played Nurse Chapel and more importantly she was the wife of the creator of Star Trek Gene Rodenberry. Barrett was also the voice of the computer on The Enterprise so I’d actually heard her a lot. But still none of this mattered.

For years I thought that I had gone to a Star Trek convention, met a “who gives a crap” celebrity not realizing that I’d met a woman who would be one of the most important figures in Sci-Fi history. She was there for Gene every night when he’d come up with new ideas. He’d tell her about them. When he died she was the one who fought to get his other work on the air and while it didn’t do as well as Star Trek we’d have never seen those shows without her.

And she played Nurse Chapel… knowing now what a great character that is, how iconic it is and how important to sci-fi it is… well I feel like a bit of a jerk. I know that she saw in my face I was a little disappointed when I met her because frankly I only knew her for this one cameo part on a show I really loved. Now  years later I can look back and think that it was a wasted opportunity but also that it was kinda worth it and how many people can say they met the wife of one of the greatest writers in sci-fi history.  

HOLY SHIT! Some one just tried to add me on Myspace!

Time to step up your game sir… Myspace is dead.